I received a tremendous amount of support, kind words, outreach and prayers yesterday. It seems that in times of darkness, you really find out who cares about you. I received messages & texts all day. I know that a lot of people were hesitant about reaching out to me. I mean, what can anyone say during a situation like this? Hell, I don't even know what to say. But, just taking the time out to tell me your sorry is more than enough. It really means so much to me that people did this.
I'm incredibly blessed that I have so many great friends in my life. Even the people I haven't known that long -- particularly, my NJ peeps -- made me feel so loved. I wish that we could have more time together. I've enjoyed the time I've spent with the friends I've made here. I hope that we are able to keep in touch after graduation and after we make our move back home. But, that is what facebook is for. :-) I had classmates reach out to me to ask me if I needed anything. Not just in terms of school work, but anything. You guys have no idea how much reaching out to me right now has meant. We have no family here, so knowing that people actually do care about me here has been tremendous.
I have a group of friends -- some of who I have never met -- that care so much about me. I've been apart of a group of people for many years now. They've seen me through a lot. I've known them for 10 years. They saw me through my successes and some of my prior dark times. I know I'll have you all in my life forever, and hope to some day finally meet all of you.
Of course, my friends from back home have reached out. And it just solidifies the fact that I need to be near you. I miss you all. More than I realized. It really makes me realize that my plan to reconnect with so many of you is important. And it's going to happen. I have a lot of good people in my life and because of your lives, my life...some of us have grown apart. Sure, we keep in touch on facebook. Or have an occasional text conversation. But, it's not the same. We're going to fix that.
Of course, not all of my friends are neglected. My closest friends (and you know who you are)...you know I love you guys. You're like family to me. I know you're here for me in the dark times. And I know that you'll celebrate with us when we do have our baby. I think back to how we all came to be friends and at the time, did not realize how much impact you would have on my life. But now, I can't imagine my life without you all.
Of course, I have dates coming up that will be hard. February 25th was going to be the day we were going to find out the gender. My baby shower was going to be in early June. My due date will be especially hard. But, I feel better knowing that I have not only the support of Sean, but all of my friends, to get through these dates.
"People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
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