My Music Picks of 2011

Here are some of my favorite songs of 2011 (in no particular order & some may or may not have come out in 2011):


Grouplove - Colours

Young the Giant - My Body

Manchester Orchestra - Virgin





Skrillex - Year of the Equinox

Matt & Kim - Block After Block

Nicki Minaj - Roman's Revenge (even tho I think this *technically* came out in 2010)

The Game - Martians Vs. Goblins

Big Sean - I Do It

Rick Ross - You The Boss

Deadmau5 - Ghosts N Stuff (came in 2009...but 2011 was the year I started appreciating Deadmau5)

2011: A Year in Review

My overall thoughts of 2011: YOU SUCK!

I don't plan on reviewing the year in relation to what happened in the world. This is my review of 2011 in MY world.

Granted...I did have good things happen to me this year.

The Good:

I got married. To an awesome man.
I finally got to travel outside of the U.S. - Jamaica!
I started Grad School - and will be done in a year and a half!
Started a new adventure (moving to NJ) with Sean.

The Bad:

Moving to New Jersey (financially...we're struggling. A lot.)
Didn't get to spend the holidays with family.
Realized that some people I considered friends didn't give two shits about me
Being so far away from my friends

The Ugly:

New Jersey Drivers
New Jersey Prices
Jamaica (not all aspects of our trip was bad. I mean, it was our honeymoon. But...it wasn't all enjoyable. The good thing is Sean and I were together during the debacle)
Considering Bancruptcy (yay?)

I have my health. Sean and the rest of my friends/family have their health too, and I'm thankful for that. We have a roof over our head, food to eat and heat. But it's hard to remember these things.
 Especially now that we are now looking into bancruptcy. I never thought it would come to this but - it has. We're out of options. It's either that, or I drop out of grad school. Which, really isn't an option. I'm doing it to better our future. Hopefully our children's future.

I'm looking forward to 2012. I mean, it can only get better, right? I have a few things I'd like to accomplish - I'll let you know if they happen. As they happen. (Or don't.)

Six Months

Six Months Ago today I married my best friend. The best man I've ever met. My Everything. In six more months, we get to eat cake. (PS: Merry Christmas!)

Shoutout to Lisa Snow for the amazing wedding photos. Check out her site: http://snowfalldesigns.com/

On Bullying & How It Really Does Get Better...

This is me. I think I was around 10 or 11 when this picture was taken. The Disney Shirt & giant glasses, in retrospect, may not have been the best look for me.

Something I don't talk about a whole lot is the fact that I was bullied as a child. When I was 8, my mom remarried and we moved. Which means I had to leave the school where I had friends to a new school that was much smaller. We moved in the middle of a school year, so I don't remember my few months at my new school too terrible. But as I got older, it got worse.

The town where I'm from...the Fourth of July used to be a huge deal. Everyone would go to the ballpark. There would be games for the kids (i.e. me at the time), BBQ, softball games and of course the big fireworks display at dusk. One year, they had horses for kids to ride around a circle. My step dad took me to ride the horse. Once I got on the horse and was riding it, some kid yelled "You're going to break the horse's back!" I went home and cried. Luckily, for me, we only lived a block or so away from the ball park.

I got teased in school. I'd get teased on the playground. In the halls. At lunch. Most of the time, the teases were not every day. Not constant. But they were consistent enough to make me feel self-conscious. A few years later, there were these two brothers that I rode the bus with. They teased me and harassed me constantly. Again, luckily for me, the ride home was short because they were the first drop-off. I would come home crying almost daily because these boys harassed me. I still don't know why I was picked on. Because I was an easy target, I guess. Eventually it got so bad my mom had to go to the school and tell the principal. It stopped from them after that. At least to my face. But there were still many days when I went home, crying.

                                        (That's me in the middle, and still one of my fav pics ever)



As I got older, the bullying became less...again, at least to my face. There were still times, up until my senior year of high school, that it was to my face. By then, I didn't let it bug me as much. As an adult, I know that the years of bullying actually have had an effect on me. I'm very self-conscious. I constantly think I'm being judged by others. I second guess myself all the time. It's something that has improved, but I still have to work on it every day.

I am in no way comparing my experiences to some of the bullying that goes down today. When I read what some of these kids are capable of...it makes me sick. Because I know how awful my experiences were. And they were nothing comparitively.

But it really does get better. Once I got to college...it was like a breath of fresh air. I made friends who were interested in genuinely being my friend. I didn't get laughed at or teased. And now, I get complimented for my abilities at school & work, instead of teased and laughed at for my flaws. To look at the bright side...the bullying built my resiliency. I feel like I can take on anything that's thrown at me. I hope that I'm able to teach my children about the effects of bullying and encourage them to be friends with those who are bullied. But it does get better! You'll encounter assholes all throughout your life. At the end of the day, they are still assholes and you just have to keep on doing what you're doing. Surround yourself with good people and you'll feel enriched.

I'm lucky I have amazing people in my life.





Oh, right...I have a blog.

Apparently Grad School keeps me busier than I thought it would.

Well, my first semester of grad school is finally over. Only 3 more to go and I'll have a Master's. Which is pretty crazy to think about.

In other news...I'm very homesick. We weren't able to go home for the holidays. Between moving, the wedding & honeymoon, Sean was completely out of time off for the year. Also...our financial issues haven't improved so that's another barrier. We bought tickets home back in September to go visit in March during spring break...so we're looking forward to that.

Anyway...for the next month, I'm sure I'll be gracing my blog with some posts. In the meantime, here are pictures.

On Grad School...

Y'all...
I love grad school. Yes, it's a challenge. And yes, it is putting me further in debt. But I love everything about it.

I'm working on my master's in social work. Which is a terminal degree...which means...no more schooling for me required :)

I'm pretty passionate about helping people. I do have my areas of interest (see previous post about giving back). And studying social work just makes me even more excited about being done and being out there practicing. I'm excited to get my license. I intend to get my license in clinical social work as well. I plan on doing a lot with that degree and that license.

I remember when I graduated 4 years ago with my bachelor's in psychology. I thought...well what now? I pretty much knew right away that I didn't want to go further with psychology. I love the subject of psychology. But...I knew it wasn't exactly where I wanted to be. I don't regret getting this degree .If anything, I think it'll help me be a stronger social worker. But I've always known that I wanted to be remembered for doing something great. And I don't mean remember by thousands or millions of people - I mean by at least one person. If I make an impact on one person's life...I'll be happy.

When I started college, I went in as an education major. I thought...well we all have that one teacher we remember, right? So, I'll do that and be remembered in that regard. I took one education class and quickly dropped that major. It was not for me. I eventually chose psychology because I really liked my psyc professors and the topic.

I don't mean to make a blanket statement...but I think a lot of social workers out there are burnt out. Done. I feel like when working with risky or "disadvantaged" populations...one needs to have a heightened sense of compassion and sympathy/empathy. I've seen social workers talk to their clients horribly before. And I don't like that. I mean...isn't it enough that people have to be "in the system" and struggle every day? And then to have the person who is helping them be rude to them? No.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm very realistc. I know that clients can be exhausting. And they have to given respect to get respect. And that clients can sometimes be very nasty to us. I know all that. I've seen and experienced all of that. But people aren't born that way. Experiences and past people they have associated with have made them like that. So maybe...if I can show some compassion and empathy to my clients...their attitude may change.

Grad school is my way to finally get the job I want. To finally help the people I want to help, in the capacity I want to help them. To make a difference. To advocate. To change.

Let's talk about the Midwest...

My original intent for this blog was to talk about moving to the East Coast and differences I encounter, etc. Of course, not all of my blog posts can be about that. But I don't think I've made one about that...except that old...rant about NJ being full of a-holes :)

When I was living in Missouri/Kansas, I remember thinking how boring it was. How I wanted to get out. What was it like living in other parts of the country? I never thought I would actually be living in another part of the country. And I thought, if it ever did happen, I'd never want to look back. And I'd want to hide the fact that that's where I'm from.

If anything, living in NJ has made me very APPRECIATIVE of living in the Midwest. Sometimes, I actually MISS it. (I know...I know.)

Today at my pracitcum, I was talking to one of the staff there about the town I grew up in. When I casually mentioned that the town only had 600 people, her eyes got big. Like, she couldn't believe towns like that exist. Her eyes almost popped out when I mentioned the fact that I only graduated high school with 34 other people. Now, us that grew up in the midwest know that my story is pretty common. These towns are plentiful in the midwest. But they do not exist in New Jersey. In fact, I do believe all of New Jersey's counties are considered urban. Or something like that.

When I was growing up, the town did not have cops. We had, what we called, a "rent a cop" who would hang out in the town for a few hours, usually on Friday and/or Saturdays. Or, this cop would travel to the other small towns nearby too. We didn't lock our cars, ever. In fact, my step-dad left (and I think still leaves) his keys in the car. The town where I'm from, everyone knows everyone and their business.

I will say this - I HATE the town where I grew up (Sorry if I offend anyone who actually still lives there and is reading this). I hated everything about it. It's a very conservative town, very country and very simple. Everyone likes country music. A town like that is not a place for a gal like me - who is the very opposite of all those things. I never felt like I fit in there, although I lived there for 10 years. I could not get out of the town fast enough.

I lived in Columbia, MO (a college town) for 4 years and then in Kansas City for 4 years. I enjoyed living in both of those towns/cities and would live in either again. Mainly because both of those towns are near and dear to my heart - and have people living there who are near and dear to my heart.

But there's something about the feeling of the midwest. Something that is lacking here in Jersey. In the midwest, you say hi to strangers, whether it be the clerk at the convenience store or someone you're walking by. People don't do that here. I miss pumping my own gas, believe it or not. That's the weirdest damn law I've ever heard of - you can't pump your own gas. Stupid. And goddamit, I miss Quik Trip. WHY DON'T THEY HAVE QUIK TRIP HERE?! Also? Jason's Deli. I've been jonesin' for some Jason's Deli...and it will be consumed on our next visit home.

But I think mostly...I miss my friends and family. Don't get me wrong...I'm incredibly happy to be on this adventure with Sean. I love him more than I can possibly say and I think we've grown stronger as a couple. But I miss my mom, my step dad. I miss my friends. I haven't made any friends here yet...and I ache for my friends and family. What makes it even worse is that we can't make it home for the holidays this year. But, we do have tickets purchased for a trip home in March. So, I'm very much looking forward to that.

If I could have anything in the world....it'd be to have all my friends and family here. Then..the things I love the most about the midwest would be here...and I'd feel like I was home.

Daddy Issues

I watched Fiddler on the Roof today...one of my favorite movies of all time. (Side note..I really want to see it on stage). Anyway...there's one part of the movie that ALWAYS makes me cry. The part where Tevye says goodbye to Hodel at the train station gets me every time. I know it's coming. And I know what it does to me. Every. Single. Time.

Yeah, yeah. I have daddy issues.

My mom was married to my father (the term used VERY loosely). Two years into their marriage, I arrived. A year after, they got divorced. It wasn't until a few years ago that I knew the whole story. He was abusive to my mom - emotionally, verbally and physically. This went on for years, from what I understand. My mom eventually was able to get out. And I've never met him, besides when I was a baby. Which...doesn't count. A few years ago, I found some letters he had written to my mom after they split up. He claimed that he wanted to be there for me. Blah blah blah.

I remember growing up, I had mixed feelings about it. My grandpa and I were best friends before he started to get dementia. I was also really close to one of my uncle's. So, I had positive male influences in my life and I didn't really realize I didn't have a dad. After my grandpa started getting sick is when I remember having anger toward my father for not being there. I was still young - 8 or so. And it was around the time my mom got remarried. My mom is still married to the same man and has been for almost 20 years. I call him "Mike" and have never referred to him as dad. It never felt right.

When I was 18 and a senior in high school, I connected with my father's sister in law. She informed me that she didn't have contact with him and gave me the last known address for him. In France. FRANCE. I wrote him. I sent him one of my senior pictures and an invitation to my graduation. I knew he wouldn't reply. And he didn't. I never got the letter returned. So, it's hard telling if he actually ever got it. Someone did.

My sensible and logical side of me knows that I'm better off for not knowing him. That....had my mom stayed with him, I'd probably be a child of domestic abuse. That my life would be completely different. But, the other side of me wants to meet him...just once. To let him know what I think and feel about him. For closure. I don't have that with him. I'll probably never have closure over this. Which is an awful feeling.

But I really want to know if I have half-siblings out there. He was 24 when they got divorced. Three years younger than I am now. I really would like to explore this, but I have no idea where I would start or how I would go about it. So for now...it's just a thought I have.

I do wish I had that daddy-daughter relationship. I've always been envious of those who have that. And I think that's why scenes such as in Fiddler on the Roof get to me. When I see a father and their child interacting, it gets to me. I don't tear up or cry or anything like that...but it's really warming to me. I do think about him on occasion - mainly on my birthday and big holidays - to wonder if I'm even a thought that crosses his mind...ever. The fact that he has a 27 year old daughter out there and he doesn't know me.

Since I was a child, I knew that the man I married had to be good father material. Because that's my thing. I want my children to have what I didn't - a father. A GOOD father. And I know Sean will be a great father...no doubt about that in my mind. He can teach our children things, play ball with them, and protect them. I look forward to having Sean's children. For us to start new traditions with them. And give them what I never had.

My Passion & Giving Back

As most of you (and by most of you, I mean the 5 people that read my blog) know, I'm currently in grad school, working toward my master's in social work. Next May, I'll have my degree and will be a real-life social worker. I'm very anxious and excited for that day.

In particular, I'm very passionate about the aging population. I have other populations I'm passionate about too - LGBT & MR/DD - but the aging popuation really sparks a fire in me.

This passion started as I really got into my first job after I graduated college. I did case management for an agency that served adults with mental illness. In particular, I was on the older adult team, so all of my clients were 50 and older (Side Note: I do NOT consider 50 to be an older adult, but that's a moot point...). Anyway, My client's ages ranged from 50-90. I loved being able to see all of my clients on a weekly basis. It was great experience for me to learn how to interact with "clients" and get to know a lot about mental illness. After 15 months, I left that job and started working in Adult Protective Services.

I'll be 100% honest - I had never heard of Adult Protective Services (APS) before I started working that job. I was like... wha? Although this was a very challenging job, I have no regrets about working there. I got exposed to SO much. The thing I saw the most was older adults who didn't know their options. Who accepted where they were and what was happening because they felt like they had to, because they were bullied in to it. Adults that accepted the abuse and/or neglect because if they made certain people in their life go away, they wouldn't have anyone. In their eyes, a shitty person is better than no person at all. I thought...how  can someone live for xx amount of years and put up with this? I think that once you reach a certain age, you DESERVE to be able to relax and not have to worry about bullshit.

I think it's absolutely sad how the United States views older adults. Expendable. Useless. It's disgusting. Why do we not value experience and wisdom? Instead, we value youth. We value perfect bodies. Great hair. Did you know that older aged individuals, men in particular, have one of the highest suicide rates? I truly believe that if our country valued this popualtion and respected this population, the suicide rates would be low. Think about it. If you were "old" and didn't get the respect you deserved, people thought you should be in a nursing home, shouldn't be driving and your kids didn't come see you...wouldn't you question the purpose of continuing to live? And let's not forget, we will all be old one day. Do we want to be viewed as useless? Expendable? In the way?

I don't.

I think it's funny how we close our eyes and plug our ears to aging. Like it's not going to happen. Like we won't be old one day. It's going to happen. Sure, it's going to take a long time to get there. But it will happen. And if we don't act now, we're all going to be viewed as a waste of space and everyone will think that we need to be in nursing homes.

My grand plan of my career is that eventually, I want to be an educator. I want to speak to groups about planning for aging. Educating groups about the resources that are out there. I also would love to speak about how valuable everyone is - even if we are old. I'd love to become respected enough to be invited to speak nationwide...maybe even worldwide. When I'm old, I hope that my grandkids and, god willing, great grandkids will come to me for advice. Because they'll respect me. Because they value me.

Being a reflective person, I really think that I've always had this passion, but the experience I've gained really ignited it. I lost my grandma when I was 4 years old. My grandma was a kid during WW2. She grew up in Germany. She met my grandpa when he was in the service. I would give ANYTHING if I could have one day with her. To learn from her. To ask her questions. My grandpa died when I was 14, but started developing dementia/alzheimer's when I was 7 or so. He was in the army for 20+ years. Again, I would LOVE to have just one day with him. And not having my biological father in my life, I don't know anything about his parents. I missed out on having grandparents. But please don't misinterpret what I say - I never replace my grandparents with my clients. I just think this is why I am so passionate about this population.

I know it's going to take me a while to achieve my career goals. I have so much more to learn. But I'm excited to get started :)

Also, as part of me becoming a social worker, I am very passionate about giving back. I donate when I can. Financially, we don't really have much right now. But, in the past, we've always participated in food drives when they are around. Last year, Sean and I donated to the YMCA by picking one of those angel things off the tree at our gym and buying a gift for a child. We also donate blood and plaetlets on a regular basis. Since right now I can't give financially, I'm growing my hair out so that I can donate to locks of love.

I wish more people would give back. I know that a lot of people do. But so many that can...don't. I'm not judging anyone, of course. Maybe it's lack of education. Maybe it's fear. I dunno. Maybe I can inspire someone :)

Choices & Changes

Do you ever stop to think about the choices you've made? What have you had made some other choice? Would your life be different?
Let me preface this post by saying: I'm very happy with my life. Despite the fact that we are currently having our own financial difficulties, I'm very happy. I have a wonderful husband. He's incredibly supportive of me. I never thought I'd get someone as good as him. Someone who is so compatible with me. Someone who is on the same page on everything as me. I know I'm lucky, because not everyone has that. I could go on and on about Sean (and I'm sure at some point I will...) but I digress.

Back to my original question: Do you ever think about the choices you've made? And how they have shaped your life? Or how the choices of others have shaped your life?

I've been thinking about this lately, and not becuase of anything that is going on with me, but my cousin. When I was 10, my aunt (her mother) was killed in a car accident. I will never forget the morning my mom came in to wake us up and tell us. It was New Year's Day. My mom, step-dad, my aunt and her boyfriend had went out. It starting snowing. My uncle was watching us. We watched Dunston Checks In and played a Mario game involving history (I don't remember the name). At midnight, me and my 2 cousins went out in the street to yell "Happy New Year." We went to bed after that. Then several hours later, my mom came and woke us up. My cousin, Alexis, just sat there. My other cousin (her brother), Kurt started crying immediately. I just sat there.

The story is long, but what ended up happening is that they each had to go live with their dads. Alexis went to Florida and Kurt went to Mississippi. My relationship with my cousins was never the same. We grew up together. They felt like my brother and sister to me. After they left, I held on to that. I, to this day, still want that feeling back. But I don't think it will ever happen. We each live in a different state. Kurt & Alexis have not had easy lives. Because their father's are complete assholes, they never got counseling for Alexis and Kurt. Because I mean, why would they need it? They just lost their mother, were torn from each other and torn from the family that knew and loved them. Both of my cousins have had drug issues. Both are currently clean, which I'm happy about. But, they still have some work to do.

Recently, Alexis lost her fiance of 6 years. She found him in the street. She's feeling completely lost. She has an 8 year old daughter, who has not taken his death well. He wasn't her biological father, but he treated her like his own. Alexis is now having financial troubles. And I wish I were in a more stable position financially to help her, especially with the holidays coming up. She hasn't really worked, as he took care of her. She's basically starting over. I'm trying to encourage her to go back to college, to help her future become more stable. I really wish she could come live with Sean & I. We could help her. But, she can't leave the state she lives in because of her daughter.

The choices that she had made has lead her to this point in her life (the death, of course, was not her choice. Obviously that's not what I'm saying). Being a self-reflective person, it's got me thinking about my choices. I've made good choices, but I've also made bad choices. But, I'm in a good place. I feel incredibly grateful about that. I wish that everyone could have this feeling that I have. You don't realize how your choices affect your future.

I go back to freshman year of college. I moved out of my mom's place. I lived in a small town. I HATED it. I hated high school. I hated everything about that area. I was never so eager to get out of one place. My first year of college was...interesting. I was really trying to figure out who I was. I started getting facial piercings. I drank...a lot. I still maintained decent grades in school, but it wasn't me. I prided myself on my grades in high school. I also met Jeremy that year, who is to this day, one of the few people who actually knows me. Who I know I can tell anything to. One of my best friends. I bonded really well with my dorm roommate. I almost moved in with her and her friend after that year. At the last minute, Jeremy told me he needed a roommate. Something told me moving in with him was the right thing for me to do.

I really think I would be living a completely different life had I not moved in with Jeremy. Don't get me wrong...Heidi is an awesome person. I miss her! But, Jeremy and I got really close. He introduced me to the place where we both worked. Where I met my ex-fiance. My ex-fiance is the reason I moved to Kansas City. Kansas City was where Sean was. And you know the rest. Of course, there were choices I made in between there. Some good. Some not so good. But now, I'm happy & healthy. I have no regrets. I've learned from the bad choices. I've also learned from the good ones.

I'm excited for the future. I'm excited to be done with grad school. I really feel like I can make a difference. I have a lot of emotion for certain populations. Things need to change. I'm hoping that because of my action, I can make changes in other's lives. In the meantime, I hope that I can support my family in their choices.

Pumpkins!

With Halloween just around the corner, I thought I'd post pictures of the pumpkins Sean & I made this year. Yay!

Feeling Down...

I've been feeling down these last few days.
I'm really missing home. And with the holidays coming, I'm going to REALLY be missing home. We won't be making it to Missouri/Kansas for Thanksgiving or Christmas. This will be the first time that's ever happened. I'm happy and thanksful to have Sean. He and Tank will make the holidays great, but I still miss my family and friends.

We're broke. We've had some financial difficulties as of late. We sat down with our budget the other day and we're in the red each month. :-\ And I know that we aren't alone in this. But it's been the first time in my adult life where it's been this bad. And it's to the point of living on a ramen noodle budget. And that's not really an exaggeration. I was talking to my mom about this the other day and she thought I was kidding.

My schoolwork is piling up and I have zero motivation to do any of it. *sigh* I'll get it done, of course. School is very important to me. Just need a little emotional boost.

I won't complain ALL of the time...

Since I started blogging again...I feel like every post, except for the first one back, have been negative. That I complain a lot. I just have a lot to say...
I really am thankful for all of the positives in my life. I have a wonderful and supportive husband, great friends (who I miss dearly), great family,  a roof over my head, food in my stomach, a car to drive, and a wondeful dog, who I love to spoil.

In high school, I was very negative. I had low self esteem. I never thought I'd get married. I was convinced I would end up an old spinster. I was also negative about pretty much everything else.

Here's the thing about me: I tend to pay attention to detail. This is one of my many strengths that, I think, is going to make me a great social worker. You may see it as complaining...I see it as pulling out details that need to be changed. Mostly. Sometimes it's just my opinion on something. :)

At my last two jobs, I complained...almost on a daily basis. And of course, everyone complains about their job, but I felt the level I was doing it at was excessive. And the reason I did this was because my voice was not heard. I could see how the policies or whatever they weren't effective and needed to be changed. But at the level I was at, no one cared what I had to say. It's frustarting...knowing that your input could help make something better, but the people who need to hear you could give two shits about what you are saying. It's even worse when the people go on and on about how they WANT to hear what you have to say. But they hardly ever mean it.

Anyway, that's me. Take me or leave me :)

The Garden State is full of Inconsiderate Assholes

When Sean and I moved from the midwest to the east coast, we knew things would be different. To sound completely cliche, we were expecting the "Guess we aren't in Kansas anymore" shock. We have experienced this shock, and more.
First of all, the drivers. MY GOD, THE DRIVERS! The drivers are probably the #1 worst thing about New Jersey. Everything is in a goddman hurry all day, every day. I've never literally almost gotten into wrecks as often as I do here. It's an almost daily occurance. It never happened this frequently in Kansas City. No wonder New Jersey has the highest car insurance rate in the whole damn country. People are very aggressive with the driving. And the honking when traffic is at a standstill? Yeah, that's totally helps. Also, ya know when you are driving down a road and you see a sign that says "Right lane ends, merge left" (or vice versa). New Jersey drivers translate that as "I'll just keep driving in this lane and cut people off, because I'm an asshole." This is one piece of evidence to prove my point of New Jersey being full of inconsiderate people.

Something happened today that kind of inspired this blog post. And it may sound silly. But it involves laundry. Yes, laundry. So, we live in an apartment complex. The apartments do not have washer/dryer hook-ups so there are laundry facilities for our use. Basically, there is a laundry facility for our part of the complex and then another facility for the other part of the complex about 1/2 block down the road. Each facility has 8 washers, 8 dryers. Nothing fancy, but it's sufficient for weekly laundry use. Until today, we have never had any issues doing our laundry or having to wait or anything like that. But here's what happened today...

We went down there around 2:30 and there were only 2 washers free. We were washing our sheets and blankets today so we had about 5 loads of laundry (a little more than usual). So, we decided to come back a little later. Around 3:15, all of the washers/dryers were full. So, we figured around 4 we will come back. We did go back at 4 and there were 4 washers available, so we started our laundry. We still needed one more, but we noticed that the other washers were done, so we waited for the people to come down and put their laundry in the dryers so we could start our last load.

First of all, we waited for 20 minutes until the people FINALLY decided to come get their laundry. I think that is one of the rudest things you can do. Just let your laundry sit there like you're some kind of asshole. Like you are better and other people don't need to do their laundry. I mean a Sunday afternoon is peak laundry time. So anyway, they came down with MORE laundry. What they did was fill 4 washers, put their baskets on top of the washers to "save" them. When they came back they had 4 more loads of laundry. And at this point took all of the washers and the rest of the dryers. At this point, my blood starts to boil. If you have 8+ loads of laundry, GO TO THE LAUDROMAT. I think it is the most inconsiderate thing I've seen. The point of a laundromat is that they have tons of washers and dryers for people just like yourselves to use. And not only did they have all of this laundry, THEY LET IT SIT!!

So by this time, the 4 loads of laundry we had started were done and there were zero dryers to use. Then, this other bitch that lives in our complex comes to get her clothes out of the dryer. It was perfect timing. She already had her baskets out. I figured she'd see that we were waiting, get her clothes and go. No. This bitch decides that she needs to fold her clothes IN the room. Not only that...but SHE FOLDED THEM ONE ARTICLE AT A TIME. I'm not even kidding. She would take one article of clothing out of the dryer, walk it to the table, fold it and go back. We do not live in a huge complex. She could have easily put her shit in a basket, gone to her apartment and took 5 hours to fold her laundry as far as I could have cared. So, at this point, I'm super fucking pissed. And I start complaining. Maybe they heard me, maybe they didn't.

So, Sean and I go to the other facility to finish our laundry. We finally did get our clothes washed and dry. The other facility was empty. As of 8pm, the assholes that had 20 loads of laundry were STILL doing laundry. Seriously. 6 hours worth of laundry? You assholes go to the laundromat. Why would you take up all of the machines, on a peak day at peak time, when clearly other people needed to use them. It's seriously probably top 5 of most inconsiderate things I've ever seen. And then the lady was giving me drity looks back to the dirty looks I gave her. REALLY?? You can't understand why I was glaring at you and blatantly talking about you while you were in the room? And furthermore, if they do their laundry once every 6 months, what the fuck does their apartment look like?? Gross.

So what did Sean and I learn? That our complex is full of assholes and that we will now be using a laundromat.

A mini-rant on celebrities

I don't know why, but I'm feeling very opinioned these last few days.
Anyway, I"ll be the first to admit I keep on the celebrity gossip. I have several blogs that I read every day. It's one of my guilty pleasures.

Anyway, this morning I was reading an artilce that the Kardashians were "surprised" that President Obama didn't want his young daughters watching their garbage TV show. In fact, the Kardashians think that the first daughters could LEARN something from their show. "Because it features girls in real-life situations facing real-life problems...health, relationships, the whole gamut."

Ok, first of all. Real-life situations?? Seriously? Since when does real-life include cameras following you around and they just happen to be there when they do certain things or are going through certain things. Seems awfully convenient. It's a real-life problem to live in a humungous house and you own a chain of stores? I'm sorry, Kardashians, but I would not call your show "real life." It may be YOUR real life, but it's not general society's real life. And the girls could learn about health and relationships? What?? Having your ass x-rayed counts as health? And I think the girls will learn about healthy relationships from their mother and father, not Kim, who has been married twice and has a sex tape. Not Khole, who got married to some dude after a month and kept the engagement secret. Not whatever that other one's name is who had a baby with a douchebag. Don't pretend your show is something it isn't. Basically, don't piss in my ear and try to tell me it's raining.

Also, Lindsay Lohan. What the fuck? Can we just throw her in jail already? She may actually LEARN something and IMPROVE her life if she was actually thrown in jail and served her sentence. She's been given probation how many times? She's been given community services how many times? She's been in rehab how many times? She's going to continue on this destructive path she is on until she actually has to face REAL consequences. It makes me sick. If *I* shoplifted or drove drunk or did anything else that she's done, you'd bet your ass I would have been in jail. And if she actually faced these consequences, she may be motivated to actually get the help she needs. She's sick, obviously. But none of thi is going to help her until she realizes that she needs help.

</rant>

THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!!

Regardless of the fact that I live 1,200 miles from KC, I still read the news there everyday. As I was reading the news today, I came across this little gem:  http://www.kansascity.com/2011/10/16/3211815/gays-are-gaining-a-larger-presence.html

First, I have a problem with the title. "Gays" are gaingina larger presence. What??! Using the term "gays" to refer to the LGBT community, I think, it degreading and insulting. But, maybe I'm just overthinking that part.

Basically, there's a jewelry company in KC who now has a billboard up, featuring two men and two wedding rings. While I think it's great that this company has done this, they also said "it's up to customers to interpret the message." How about you just say "Yes, these are two gay men who bought their wedding rings at our store." You either support gay rights or you don't...you can't be in between.

The artcile goes on to interview some woman who says "What am I going to tell my children." Queue Reverand Lovejoy's wife from the Simpsons saying WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN. I love how that is the first place people's minds go. Just like with the whole Chaz Bono 'controversy' on Dancing with the Stars. People were all concerned that their children were all going to be gay and would be confused.

How about teaching your children about tolerance? About acceptance? How about teaching them that people are different? But it's the differences in people that make us stronger? It makes me so sad that in 2011, homosexuality is still such a taboo in this country. As of today, there are only 12 states that recognize same-sex marriages. I hope that by the time my children are adults, all 50 states recognize same-sex marriage. This is a civil rights issue. Some people still look at gay marriage and homsexuality in general as a moral issue. No. That's not how it works.

One of the many reasons I am getting my MSW is to fight for these social injustices, such as the issue of same-sex marriages. It's not fair to so many.

The article concludes by saying that the company did it with a whisper, not a shout. How about shouting something? We've had way too many people whispering for too long.

Oh yeah....so I have this blog...

My original intent of this blog was to write about my life and dedicate entries to comparing the midwest to the East Coast. So, I'm gonna start doing that ;)
We arrived in New Jersey on July 15, 2011. Which means, we've now been living here 3 months. It's been an interesting transition. We both still feel like the new kids in class. We aren't sure how certain things work and I'm almost certain my midwest "twang" comes out every now and again. Oh well.

I'm now in grad school full time. I'm lucky to have a supportive husband who is able to support me financially, emotionally, in every way possible, while I get my master's degree. Financially, things haven't been easy for us, but the struggle we're going through now will eventually end. And my obtaining my master's will benefit future us. :)

In general, I like New Jersey. But, I miss the hell out of Kansas City. Sean and I talked a lot about moving here and decided to do this together. Once we made the decision, we had several conversations where we didn't think we would miss KC. But, I do. And I think it's mainly the people I miss. If I had my friends & family  here, I would probably not think twice about KC.

We were married on June 25th. Once I tell people that, they give me a look. And then proceed to tell me we were crazy for taking on all that change at once. But it's been good. Married life is great. I can't imagine being married to anyone else and experiencing this journey with anyone else. <3

(Pictures taken by Lisa Snow. Like her work? Check our her site! http://snowfalldesigns.com/)

So...it's been a month...

I really do plan on being more "on top of" this whole blog thing once school is over. I have a lot of things I'd like to write about. But I've been INSANELY busy...soon my pets.

Tank.

Oh, Tank.

I was never a fan of little dogs. I always had medium and large dogs growing up. I always categorized  little dogs as yappy and annoying. But then Sean came into my life. And with Sean, came Tank.

 I love this dog. Like a lot. He's my boy. He's the sweetest dog. He loves to cuddle. He's fun to play with. He loves walks. I can't imagine my life without him now. He's a rat terrier. He's 20 pounds of cuteness. So cute he deserves his own entry.

Going to the Chapel...

I'm getting married on June 25th. I've pretty much been in planning mode since we got engaged on November 14, 2010.

Some people give me a face when I describe my wedding to them. Sean and I decided pretty much from the start that we wanted a small, but nice wedding. Neither of us was interested in feeding our guests a full meal. We decided on finger foods & punch/champagne. We decided not to have a bridal party (gasp!). We knew that we wanted to spend the majority of our money on the honeymoon.Which we did.




It's frustrating at times. Sean and I are paying for everything ourselves. It would be nice, for once in our lives, that we get financial help for something so important. It would be nice to be given money for just our wedding. At times, I wish we had this because it kind of would be nice to have all of the traditional things. And a bigger wedding. But, the reality is that we're paying for this shin-dig ourselves.

All-in-all...it doesn't matter where we get married or how many people are there. I think there's too much emphasis placed on the wedding and not the marriage. I'm excited to marry Sean. He's the love of my life - my best friend. We could get married in a barn for all I care. I just wish the time would tick down faster. 110 days!

The Journey of 1,000 miles beings with a single step...

So cliche, right?

I've had blogs before. And the first post is always the most awkward. I mean, talking about me and who I am in a single post is kind of...forced? Most of the people who will be reading this know me. And if someone random happens to come across this and likes my writing...then they'll *hopefully* stick around...read this stuff and get to know me.

I've been contemplating starting a blog again for a while. As sort of an outlet. I like to write. Not that I try to be insightful or artsy with my writing...I just like to put words out there. For someone to read. Or no one to read. Or just for me to read. Regardless...I'm not trying to do anything fancy here. I'm just doing me.

Why the name "Midwest Transplant?" Well, I've lived in Missouri or Kansas my whole life. I've never known anything outside of it. Sure, I've traveled a bit (not internationally...yet) but what I know and am comfortable with is the Midwest. But...that will be changing in a few months. I'm getting married in June and by the end of July we'll be heading eastward.  There will be more details about that as we go along.

I feel like I Have so much to say. There is a lot going on in my life. But...these are for another day  :)